- October 31, 2017
- Categories: 13 Reasons Why
13 Reasons Why can help set up discussions about how we treat one another
By: Dr. Bill Clark
It matters how we treat each other - especially how boys/girls treat girls/boys.
13 Reasons Why (the book more so than the show) dramatically highlights peer relationships and provides a natural catalyst for kids to discuss their own relationships and tendencies.
It matters how we treat each other especially how boys/girls treat girls/boys.
Thoughtful kids might be easily encouraged to consider:
How do boys treat girls in my school or group?
How do guys treat guys?
How do girls treat girls?
How do girls treat guys?
How do I treat others?
What do I do when I see unjust or inappropriate treatment of others?
Reason 5 to Engage: Hannah’s downward spiral was mostly about a string of “small” relational events that could happen to anyone. This sets up potentially helpful discussions about how we treat each other.
Lessons from Dr. Thompson's Attachment: Shame and the Embodiment of Beauty workshop.
By Pam Stroup
On September 16, I attended an LCI workshop entitled Attachment: Shame and the Embodiment of Beauty, featuring local psychiatrist and author, Dr. Curt Thompson. In his book, Anatomy of the Soul, Dr. Thompson writes of attachment, “in order to fully engage our relationship with God, it is most helpful to be fully aware of the patterns by which we have attached to our primary caregivers. The ways we have connected have important correlations with the structure and function of our brains.” I wasn’t sure what to expect from the workshop, but he had me spellbound much of the time. I was intrigued and a bit overwhelmed with the content, inspired by the application of the material to the Bible and the Story of God, and touched by his own vulnerability. Also, my own emotions were engaged.
Five things I learned…
Understanding the attachment process can help you have a more peaceful life.
by Cindy Hunter
Last week we made our annual sojourn to the beach. As is typical, we planned our vacation to coincide with our good friends. That put one of our daughters a block away from her lifelong best friend. Perfect proximity by my way of thinking.
My long ago Outer Banks trips with my childhood bestie “June Bug” conjured up mystical memories of surf, sand, and the joy of joining another family, albeit for just a week. The fact that these trips only happened for me between the ages of 10 and 15, forty plus years ago, has done nothing to dim their luminosity in my memory.
And so it goes, periodically, that I must entice my mountain-loving husband and kids back to the place where life was at its best for me as a child. For many years, I did…
13 Reasons Why Can Help You be a Better Role Model
by: Dr. Bill Clark
“Artists always get there first!” - Dr. Steve Garber, author of The Fabric of Faithfulness
The past few weeks we’ve walked through a series called “Reasons to Engage,” focused on the popular Netflix series, 13 Reasons Why. If you’re just joining us, I’d encourage you to read the complete series here.
The reviews for the Netflix’ show, 13 Reasons Why, range from glowing, to dismissive, to highly critical. Obviously, adults are cautioning kids about the graphic nature of the show and the seriousness of the topics—especially teen suicide—while some parents are prohibiting watching altogether.
Understandably, everyone fears a rash of suicide threats or attempts, or an increase in victimizing behaviors after being exposed to the show. While these warnings about the show seem valid, the prohibitions seem overly cautious and short sighted.
The series, and the story…
13 Reasons Why Can Start Valuable Conversations with Kids
by Dr. Bill Clark
The past few weeks we have been walking through a series entitled, Reasons to Engage, focused on the popular Netflix series, 13 Reasons Why. In this series we are looking at what value you can draw from the show, and ultimately addressing the question, "should we engage in the conversation around 13 Reasons Why, teen suicide, and some of the dark topics that is addresses?"
The show, 13 Reasons Why, provides a natural but difficult opportunity to enter into the world of kids, especially your own. But we cannot engage until we’ve earned the right to ask questions or invite a discussion by watching the show with an open mind.
We cannot engage until we’ve earned the right to ask questions or invite a discussion by watching the show with an open mind.
Obviously, many kids will deny watching, downplay any significant impact from watching it, or resist…
13 Reasons Why Exposes Powerful Questions About Life
by Dr. Bill Clark
The past few weeks we have been walking through a series entitled, Reasons to Engage, focused on the popular Netflix series, 13 Reasons Why. (Read the series).
The show captured something (the risk, the drama, the danger, the power) of the current adolescent culture. It’s estimated that millions of kids, ages 10 and up, have watched and resonated in some way. That many kids becomes a number that screams at us— “There is something here!”
Many kids were compelled to spend 13 hours doing something behind their parents back— lying about it if need be. Kids are identifying with it—young kids, “normal” kids, church kids, innocent kids, aware kids, depressed kids, hurt kids. That fact alone should capture us and make us ask ourselves, “What is it about this story/show that is so compelling?”
Kids are identifying with the show. That fact alone should capture us.
Reason to Engage #1: Adults Should Be Willing to Step into the Uncomfortable
Why would any adult who cares about, raises, counsels, teaches, or works with kids watch the Netflix series, 13 Reasons Why?
Because you care about young people. Because you know it’s hard to be a kid today (and a parent). Because you know kids need to be seen, known, and not left alone.
Kids need to be seen, known, and not left alone.
This show dramatically presents various realities students of all ages experience. It helps kids to see fictional characters dealing with some of the treachery and risks they are familiar with already. It gives them a voice and a context (“Why is this happening to me?”). It models, for kids who silently struggle, the need to confide in someone. “Healthier” or more caring peers may be inspired to take risks to support and engage struggling friends or classmates. 13 Reasons…
- June 27, 2017
- Categories: 13 Reasons Why, Caring for Others, Counseling Tips, Pain, Parenting, Suicide
Reasons to Engage "13 Reasons Why"
by Dr. Bill Clark
Over the next 6 weeks, we’re posting a series of blogs discussing the Netflix series, 13 Reasons Why, based on the 2007 book.
If you haven't heard about it yet, the show 13 Reasons Why depicts the trials of a teen named Hannah, who decides to end her life after episodes of bullying, voyeurism, rejection, betrayal and sexual assault (as both a witness and victim). The viewer cannot help but see and feel the cumulative diet of shame and injury wear her down and deplete her resolve. In a bizarre (and unlikely until now) act of care, vengeance, explanation, and/or confession, she leaves tapes targeting the 13 relationships/events that led to her decision.
I first took notice because school systems sent statements home to parents warning them about the show, a rare occurrence. Then two of the McLean Presbyterian Church fellows watched and shared…
by Dr. Bill Clark
Recently, I sat with two friends at Starbucks discussing ministry, marriages, marriage dilemmas, the things we tend to say and think about marriage. As we talked I felt the familiar feeling; “Why is this so hard? So confusing?”
The three of us have good marriages but we freely admit how we fail to love well, how we take our wives for granted, how we exhaust them. We still enjoy marriage and care, deeply. But even we find ourselves wondering, “What do I do now?” We all seem to want a guidebook, a manual, something clear and compelling that we can all subscribe to; something that tells us, “What do I do when ____ is happening?”
We all seem to want a guidebook, a manual, something clear and compelling that we can all subscribe to.
One of the men, involved in a marriage ministry, described 3 marriages which ended in divorce…
- December 20, 2016
- Categories: Gospel
How stunning it is that people everywhere on the planet know the story of this ancient and humble birth, with the young mother said to be a virgin, the visitation of wise men from other countries, and the fulfillment of an ancient prophecy. What a surprising, cunning and shocking God we worship!
At the very beginning of human history, God promised Adam and Eve that their offspring would crush the head of our enemy (Gen 3:15). This was the first of many cryptic promises God made, and the first of many clues as to His plan to save us.
It appears the Good News began before the manger.
Andy Stanley recently gave a message, “Who needs Christmas?” and began by suggesting the Christmas story, rather than beginning with a pregnant virgin, begins with an elderly couple, Abram and Sarah. They were convinced they would never have children, yet God promised otherwise (Gen 15:1-21).
"One of the many things I received in LCI was a greater awareness and understanding of how much suffering and struggle takes place in the body of Christ. I was privileged to hear stories of immense wounded-ness from childhood and adult relationships, and how Christ is redeeming each of those stories for His glory."